Dang it! Caught Me Walking!


You never see a guy “walking” for exercise, right? There’s a solid reason for that; we’re afraid someone will see us [not running]. It’s especially true if you’re a runner or some kind of endurance nut. I’m sure there are plenty of exceptions and probably people will laugh at me about this but I’m coming clean.

WalkingToday I had a run workout assigned but I had some sore core/back muscles from a few days ago so figured a faster walking session might substitute. I’ve done this before when I had a hip replaced and pulled the same stunt:

I carried an envelope so it looked like I was delivering something important! When I told my wife about it she was horrified/freaked/bewildered and laughed, “I can’t believe you’re so arrogant!”

“What?! Arrogant?! What are you talking about?! This is just protective coloration, that’s all.”  So the next day she told her trainer what I had done, thinking he’d just laugh and laugh. He said “I never walk, I just keep running, even if I can’t, if there are people around.”

HAH!! See!!? Then I also remembered one day last summer during a hot-as-hell Atlanta afternoon when I was running up a long hill and some [ younger] guy had stopped to walk a bit….when I passed by he looked over at me and said “Oh gosh! You saw me!” Yup, I saw him walking.

Think about your dog, especially if there are two or more….if one is sick, they won’t show it. Instead of allowing the others to see, they’ll go off and hide rather than reveal “weakness”. So it’s innate; it’s buried in my brain somewhere, whether DNA, environment, or my choice of food.

So I feel vindicated; at least somewhat. But now that the cat’s out of the bag the neighborhood folks will likely point and laugh at my stupid cover up as I walk briskly past, holding my “Important Business Envelope” and trying to be kind of invisible. Carry on, Duane, at least you’ve confessed.